Name that tune
Federal Computer Week columnist and blogger Steve Kelman tapped into people’s musical sensibilities recently when he asked them to come up with songs that describe the current government procurement environment. He got an earful in response.
From Kelman’s blog: Hillary Clinton has been soliciting suggestions for a title song for her presidential campaign on the Internet. According to the New York Times, suggestions have ranged from the Monkees’ ‘I’m a Believer’ to ‘Cold as Ice’ by Foreigner.
This got me thinking about a similar exercise for the procurement community.
As with Clinton, some title choices will depend on one’s views of the person. Supporters of Lurita Doan might assign her Aretha Franklin’s ‘Respect,’ while critics might prefer Santana’s ‘(You’ve Got to Change) Your Evil Ways’ or even the Eagles’ ‘Lyin’ Eyes.’
Other choices are more straightforward. Henry Waxman’s hearing room could be dubbed ‘Hotel California,’ also by the Eagles. Tom Davis’ song might be ‘We Can Work It Out’ by the Beatles. Reflecting his passion for metrics and agencies’ views of the Office of Management and Budget, I would suggest for Clay Johnson ‘96 Tears’ by Question Mark and the Mysterians. And, of course, Danielle Brian of the Project on Government Oversight should get Elvis Presley’s classic ‘Suspicious Minds.’
There’s an obvious hit for GSA — ‘Call Me’ by Blondie, with its memorable refrain, recently appropriated for a telephone commercial: ‘Call me, call me any anytime.’
Asked to choose a song for myself, I would of course select the Standells’ paean to Boston, ‘(Love that) Dirty Water,’ although my wife, who has written about the Charles River cleanup, will remind us that the title is now out-of-date.
However, others might make a different selection. POGO would probably choose the brilliant lyrics and pulsing beat of the Who song about a failed revolution, ‘Won’t Get Fooled Again.’
Readers sent Kelman many suggestions, including the following:
Given how Doan, administrator of the General Services Administration, is getting carved up, one reader nominated “Piece of My Heart” by Janis Joplin, which includes the line “Take another little piece of my heart now, baby!”
Doan’s song for 2007 — “Cruel Summer” by Ace of Base.
To express Doan’s feelings toward the Office of Special Council’s Scott Bloch and Rep. Waxman (D-Calif.) — “Cold, Cold Heart” by Hank Williams.
Doan’s response to Waxman’s second summons to testify — “Here We Go Again.” For Doan’s testimony to OSC — the Bee Gees’ “Jive Talkin’.” OSC’s hopes for Doan — “You Get What You Give,” the theme song for the movie “Homeward Bound II.”
For Doan in general — “I’m Here for the (Republican) Party” by Gretchen Wilson and “Make the World Go Away” by Eddy Arnold.
For the Defense Department’s contracting shop in Iraq — “Help!” by the Beatles.
For the Federal Emergency Management Agency — “American Pie” by Don McLean, with the lyrics changed to read, “Drove my Chevy to the levee and the levee was gone!”
For the Interior Department’s GovWorks Federal Acquisition Center — “Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap” by AC/DC.
For GovWorks and the fee-for-service crowd — “I Fought the (Federal Appropriations) Law” by the Bobby Fuller Four.
For the leaders of GovWorks — “Your Cheatin’ Heart” by Hank Williams and whatever tune the Fat Lady is singing these days.
For career contracting specialists — “Take this Job and Shove It” by Johnny Paycheck and “We Gotta Get Out of This Place” by the Animals.
